Sunday, August 3, 2008

don't greet your boss with "how the fuck are you today?" and things of this nature...g's paraphrase of what dave said.

When there is great sadness, I want to do something. Wash every dish in the cupboard, cook people meals, vacuum, scrub the bathroom floor, anything, anything, anything, anything as long as it means I don't have to sit still with the sadness.

K8's brother-in-law is one of the best people I have ever had the privilege of meeting, and I'm going to quote his e-mail to K8, because it's just one of the best things I've read, in terms of advice in times of grief... Also, he calls and says "I'm not going to tell you to have a good day," because he knows it's not going to be a good day.

People like this are invaluable. They are the ones who make the world go round, by simply living out what it means to be a friend. Offering people soup, telling them you love them, sitting down with them and calling them even if they can't talk back to you. These people remind me that the world does keep on turning, that somewhere in the world there is still goodness, and that there is still much to live for.

Dave's E-mail:

1 little bit of advice from somebody not comatose such as yourself. As your mind is so totally filled with thoughts of the little guy or filled with other thoughts to keep your mind off the little guy…………It is soooooo easy for people to let their guard down in times of trauma, I am sure you are catchin my drift……All this to say please be deliberate in everything for a while i.e stopping at stop lights and stop signs, looking over your shoulder before you change lanes, safe following distance,don't step on the soap in the shower, open doors before you go through them, don't greet your boss with "How the Fuck are YOU today" and other things of this nature that could cause you harm.

I love you.

Be extra safe.

P.S. I think that people named Dave must be really amazing, because the ones I know are all people who blow me away.

1 comment:

Ingrid said...

Sorry to hear of your sadness and glad you have good people with you in it. You are lovely and real. Carry on. Peace.