Wednesday, April 16, 2008

“I would never lie. I willfully participate in a campaign of misinformation." - Fox Mulder

So the problem with telling people you're on a 28 date campaign in 2008 is that they try and give you advice instead of setting you up with dates, which is the point of telling them about the campaign in the first place.

I don't want advice. If I wanted advice, I would have asked my grandfather. And here's what he would say: 1) Cook for somebody. 2) Wear a dress. 3) Smile. And that would be all. I know, because he's given it to me before. Unsolicited. But when an 84 year old tells you something, it's important to pay attention.

Anyway, I'd rather have dates. I was trying to avoid the Internet in this campaign. I really wanted to see if through the people I knew I could find 28 dates...but I might resort to match.com or some other Internet atrocity in June if I haven't made significant progress. Significant progress being, maybe 14 dates. By June. That'd be awesome.

Mostly people are saying they don't know a quality guy. I say, hey, I'm going for quantity here. And I'd like to think that if my three requirements (Just to review: 1) single 2) straight 3) self-sufficient - read:job...) worked for Phoebe Kudrow in P.S. I Love You, they could potentially work for me. I know, it's a movie. It could even be argued it's a bad movie. But by the end of the damn thing, after asking every guy she came into contact with if they were 1) single 2) straight 3) had a job and 4) then kissing them, she figured it out. I'm hoping, in my self-delusional way, that this will somehow work for me.

3 comments:

LK said...

lisa kudrow, my friend.

Gretzky said...

I know!!! I messed up considerably. I meant to say Lisa, I really did, but I think she'll forever be phoebe in my mind. I can't believe kylee didn't catch this. she must not be reading...

hope said...

well said. i'm constantly asking my friends to lower their standards when it comes to setting me up with men.